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Unique Benefits of Membership:

  • Intimate contact with those of like interests.
  • The safety of numbers.
  • Enhanced lifespan: life seems to take longer when you are with us.
  • Spiritual support in case of legal prosecution.
  • POWER.
  • Never again shall you be bored!
  • Never again shall you be cold!
  • AND as a member, you'll receive exclusive news of free or discounted products, a first look at new designs, members-only free gifts, and other premium benefits.

Dire Consequences of Inaction:

  • Greatly reduced sex life.
  • Justified paranoia.
  • Constant fear.
  • The envy of no one.

Free Membership

If you join today, we'll waive the $4.95 signup fee, making your membership completely free. You will never be charged for your membership, and you may cancel at any time. Plus, you earn one dollar just for joining today. Limited time offer, so hurry! And, throughout the lifetime of your membership, you will have opportunities to get select items for free or at special discount prices.

JOIN HERE!

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Free to join, and you can cancel at any time.

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Wouldn't you really rather be one of us?